My New Health Journey!
Over the last three years, I’ve put a lot of time and energy into improving my mental health and finding recovery from an eating disorder. For a very long time, these things ruled my life, so it was a long road, but I’ve gotten to a really good place. I’m no longer in treatment (though I’d happily reach out if I needed it) and can say that I truly am recovered.
Now it’s time to separate now from then. I’m not that sick person anymore, it’s time to make my physical health the priority. I’ve obviously never had a good relationship with food or exercise, but with ed very much in the past I’m ready to work on that!
Rather than waiting for the new year, on November 29, 2021, I went to my first PT session with Cassie Bubb, someone who has made quite an impact on my life in the 2 months I’ve known her. Weight loss is a huge goal for me, but with Cassie’s help, this journey has become so much more. I’ve gone from seeing the gym as just a way to reach my weight loss goal, to a way of taking time for myself. I’m not going to lie and say I love every bit of it, not a chance. But finding enjoyment in something that was once a punishment for eating is amazing!
I never would have thought I’d be someone who wanted to lift heavier weights. I never would have thought I’d want to lift any kind of weight full stop. This is where those new goals come in to play. I want to see what I can do. I want to improve on every exercise, and I want those personal bests.
This week, I struggled with barbell box squats. On Monday I was saying there’s no way I’m ever going to get it right. On Wednesday I was saying bring it on. I haven’t put weight on the bar yet, but that bar is 20kg! and, I’ve gone up from a 15kg bar the week before so that’s a win. I’m working towards a stronger, healthier, and happier version of myself that I never knew I wanted. It’s really a testament to what having the right people around you can do.
When it comes to food, I’m learning to fuel my body for the new goals I have. One of the most difficult things here is eating more. I’ve been programmed to think more food equals more weight. That’s just not true though. I’m learning about calorie deficits and macros and weighing my food so I can see what a portion of a certain food is. I thought that would be confronting too, but it’s more of an eye-opening experience. I’m looking at the way I was eating before and can’t believe I was mistreating my body with all the crap! I’ve switched to sugar free drinks, eating takeaway once a week and having the small size of whatever it is. Choosing takeaway that aligns with my macro goals, eating 20 grams of chocolate to satisfy a craving rather than consuming the whole block…
It’s hard to believe where I was not that long ago. Struggling in so many ways with my health, both mentally and physically. I was so focused on not going backwards, I didn’t let myself move forward. I’m really excited for all the things to come on this new health journey. It’s taking up a lot of my time so why not share that with others? Maybe this can inspire someone else to make even a small change in their life. One step in the right direction is a win! Keep an eye on the blog and socials!